Better Questions

     We are in the week of Thanksgiving in the U.S. and almost a month until Christmas. This year has been unbelievably short and I'm not ready. I'm excited to bake and glad to be wearing my sweaters and trying not to get caught in the rush. In other news, I have finally found the courage to submit my book to two separate publishing companies. One of the submissions I messed up but the point is, I've done it. I've taken the first step. Either at the end of last year or the beginning of this one, I started looking deeper into the publishing process, got overwhelmed and scared, and stopped even writing for a bit. I've dreamed of being published for years now and though I don't doubt the quality of my writing as much as I did, the fear of being known and rejected was scary. Greater than that was the fear of success. There would be no going back once my name and my words were out there and I wasn't ready for that. I still don't know that I am but I'm getting there.

    In the spirit of the season, I kind of want to talk about gratitude. I complain all the time. Ask anyone in my family, ask my boyfriend, they can attest to it. When I realize what I'm doing, I'll proceed to complain about how much I complain. It's a wonder they tolerate me as much as they do. I do want to be better about it. I love the beautiful things around me but it's easy to get distracted. I'm surprised at my patience and grace when I go to an understaffed Starbucks but verge on an emotional breakdown trying to make cream puffs. Maybe it's a girl thing, I don't know. I want to have more patience with myself and the circumstances I find myself in but it's so much easier to have grace for the things outside of myself. The challenges I face seem so much bigger than everything else, even though, for this year at least, they've mostly been good.

    I've talked a lot this year about focus and perspective. I start complaining when I lose sight of how blessed I am. We cannot fathom God's love for us, I can barely imagine someone dying for me, but that's where our focus should be. Humans are emotional creatures and I adore that about us. Our empathy is so valuable to our society, both grief and love have led to incredible inventions, and we're convicted by passions to fight for things that matter to us. That doesn't make having emotions easy sometimes but I'm glad to have them. I just don't want to be completely driven by them. I don't want them to get in the way of peace and joy. I want my focus to be on better things, to guard my thoughts and my tongue.

    This week, my pastor talked about the power of a better question. It's easy to ask "how could this happen?" instead of "what is it for?" or "how can I learn from this?" The example he used came out of Numbers 14. "How could God bring me this far to leave me?" instead of "why would He bring me this far just to abandon me now?" God started a work in us, sent His son to die for us, He's not just going to give up on us now. Instead of questioning what's been lost, it's better to question what we still have. Better questions lead to better decisions. Does this make sense? I'm not just saying this because I'm a writer; words have so much power. The things we say about ourselves and our situations have an affect, for better or worse, on where and who we are. We have to include God in our questioning. He works best with questions. Most often, that's how He'll answer. 

    Where we fix our eyes has such a big effect on everything we do. It affects our words, our actions. We can't start in the wrong place and expect to end up in the right place. God has to be the foundation of our lives without exception. It all starts and ends with Him anyways. We have to learn, give ourselves space to grow. We have to make a conscious effort to choose gratitude and grace over complaining and impatience. I don't ever want to lose sight of what God has done and what He's doing because I'm crying over something that as little to no effect the next day. God is greater and my walk with Him is more important than fear and doubt. He's the source of joy and peace, He promises to be steadfast. I will probably always get caught up in life and emotions but that doesn't mean God ceases to be faithful with me. I want people to see God in me but that isn't going to happen if I'm focused on the negative things that happen. 

    Find something to be thankful for every day. Look for reasons to be glad. Change what you look for and the questions you ask. Make the decision to be patient with yourself and the people around you. Let your focus be on the light, on the good things. 

Yours Truly,

Rey